Friction and Harmony

It seems California has a little problem:

California Penal Code Sections 833-851.90

CHAPTER 5. ARREST, BY WHOM AND HOW MADE

834b. (a) Every law enforcement agency in California shall fully cooperate with the United States Immigration and Naturalization Service regarding any person who is arrested if he or she is suspected of being present in the United States in violation of federal immigration laws.

(b) With respect to any such person who is arrested, and suspected of being present in the United States in violation of federal immigration laws, every law enforcement agency shall do the following:

(1) Attempt to verify the legal status of such person as a citizen of the United States, an alien lawfully admitted as a permanent resident, an alien lawfully admitted for a temporary period of time or as an alien who is present in the United States in violation of immigration laws. The verification process may include, but shall not be limited to, questioning the person regarding his or her date and place of birth, and entry into the United States, and demanding documentation to indicate his or her legal status.

(2) Notify the person of his or her apparent status as an alien who is present in the United States in violation of federal immigration laws and inform him or her that, apart from any criminal justice proceedings, he or she must either obtain legal status or leave the United States.

(3) Notify the Attorney General of California and the United States Immigration and Naturalization Service of the apparent illegal status and provide any additional information that may be requested by any other public entity.

(c) Any legislative, administrative, or other action by a city, county, or other legally authorized local governmental entity with jurisdictional boundaries, or by a law enforcement agency, to prevent or limit the cooperation required by subdivision (a) is expressly prohibited.

Fucking assclowns.

Any of this look familiar?  Like, perhaps a certain law in Arizona that has been the cause of California officials calling for boycotts and charges of racial profiling and Federal lawsuits? Someone might want to point out to California officials that their law is rather vague on the whole ‘racial profiling’ gig.  California Code 834b offers absolutely none of the provisions that protect individuals from racial profiling as prescribed in the Arizona law.  What fucking kind of racists are they, anyhow?!

As for that last part, section c: I believe the mayors of Los Angeles and San Francisco might ought to be looking for a call from the State Attorney’s office soon, regarding an upcoming appointment for a rather public ass-crawling.  Perhaps a call to the State’s representatives demanding such an investigation would be in order.

When you communicate with California representatives, you might also want to mention that due to their state’s despicable behavior and betrayal of the American People and open hostility to the citizens of Arizona, California produce no longer has a place on your dinner table.  Perhaps even remind them of the further consequences of their State’s reckless behavior in inciting civil discord among the ranks of ungrateful illegals whom nurse at the teat of the taxpayer.  And no, the parasites are not fucking welcome!

Finally, while you’re feeling the high of civic activism, a gesture of support to Arizona for leading the charge to protect our borders can’t hurt.

TIP – LEARN ESPAÑOL:  When you meet an illegal on the street or in your community, the proper way to greet them is to say boisterously, “¡Vete a la chingada!”

And I thought putting up with the Mormon Elders and Jehova’s Witnesses was a pain in the ass…

Whoopi Goldberg, you are an ignorant chunt.

I don’t know what the living fuck you consider “Rape-rape” to be, but if it’s worse than a middle-aged prick drugging a CHILD, ordering a CHILD to strip and take naked photographs of the CHILD, having vaginal intercourse with a CHILD and finally shooting a load of semen into the rectum of a CHILD while having forced anal intercourse with a CHILD, all WHILE THE CHILD IS PLEADING “NO, NO, NO“…  Then I thank God to not be able to even imagine the kinds of horrors that exist in your sick, twisted world that comprise what you would acquiesce to calling “Rape-rape.”

That Roman Polanski wasn’t able to personally receive his Oscar because he is a child molesting coward is no punishment – it is not “justice” by any terms.  How people stand by this shriveled old sack of shit is beyond me, but for the record…  Mr. Polanski’s arrest on a 30-year-old conviction has nothing at all to do with the man.  It has everything to do with the integrity of our system of Justice.  It has everything to do with the fact that he accepted and acknowledged his guilt and then fled to avoid sentencing on a crime that he readily acknowledged committing.  That he has escaped justice and lived a comfortable life for thirty years is the real travesty.  Now he needs to go experience for himself what it is like to have someone overpower him and shoot a wad in his ass – I’m sure there will be plenty of qualified applicants to audition for the role in whatever prison he serves his sentence.

But if the American Justice System isn’t good enough for him, there is MY system of justice for an ass-raping waste of humanity like Mr. Polanski and countless others who choose children as their victims:

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Oddybobo wrote a post about boobs heated rant about being misunderestimated in her job, where she disclosed the fact that she’s an Ivy-Leaguer who is still quite capable of “going redneck.”

Gotta love that image… She’s my new personal hero!

Her story reminded me of my own experience during my very expensive custody battle to get my kids. “Very expensive,” because at one point, I had to fly my attorney and his assistant 2,000 miles for a three-day junket to depose witnesses in the case. (My sons had been living in Utah with their monster mother.)

Being from coastal Alabama, it was a mini ‘vacation’ for my legal staff to go see the Rockies, and they soaked it up. They also brought no small part of Parrotthead, beach-life style to the depositions…

On the first day of depositions, my attorney wore khaki cargo shorts, worn deck-shoes and a seersucker, short-sleeved, comfortable shirt… with a button-down collar. He was tanned and looked like he had just stepped-off the deck of his sailboat. He carried an overstuffed briefcase which he dug-through almost absentmindedly from time to time, and he “lost” his reading glasses a few times – at least once on his head.

The defense attorney – also from our area – was dressed neatly in a suit and tie. They swelled-up with undeserved pride at the sight of their attorney in comparison to mine, and scoffed to themselves so everyone could hear, “looks like he forgot he was supposed to be working today,” (laughter) and, “hey buddy, the nearest beach is that-a-way!”

At first, I admit even I was a little shocked to see him dressed so casually. I had only ever seen him with the collar of his shirt unbuttoned, tie thrown over the back of the chair where his briefcase sat. All the hosting staff at the legal office that we were “renting” for three days (read, unbelievably expen$ive) were staring wide-eyed at us through the glass-walls of the conference room. Was this really an attorney? Did he actually expect to win a case acting so casually and cavalier?

As the grave details of our case began to emerge, I noticed that the looks I got from the staff turned to pity – “you poor thing… such terrible circumstances, but you don’t stand a chance with that absent-minded, drawling beach-bum of a lawyer! I bet his office – and home – are below-deck on some marina-bound, run-down barnacle-barge, tsk tsk.”

I might have been worried myself if I hadn’t already heard such tales from MamaBear… who had worked for over three decades at Alabama’s largest law firm, and had thus escorted the senior partners on at least one occasion to similar actions in New York City. In her case, her boss wore a plaid flannel shirt and bolo-tie. (The cold of the North just doesn’t agree with us Southerners!) His characteristic southern-drawl was as thick as molasses, and he frequently held-up his hand to turn to his junior partner to have him repeat what had just been said. Mom was mortified – they were out of their league! The high-dollar, window-dressed, big-city attorneys just grinned at each other like sharks circling for the kill… Until Mr. A. threw his glasses on the table, stood-up and shed his mock-ignorant persona, then proceeded to shred them with their own preconceived notions – giving them a good lesson in redneck lawyerin’.

So I knew what my attorney was doing; he was using their own ignorance to disarm them. His attitude was so deliberately cavalier (bordering on disdain – but they couldn’t recognize it as I could) also because he had no doubt we were going to win this custody case and free my children permanently from the devastating evil to which they had been subjected. (At the time these depositions took place, I had already been granted temporary custody under an emergency order.)

I also had the satisfaction of knowing that my attorney was a retired family court judge with over thirteen years of experience on the bench in the very court in which this matter was to be decided. I knew firsthand the respect we got when we walked into the courthouse of our turf, where even the security staff still snapped to attention as they greeted him, “good morning, Judge!”

And while their attorney was damned good – I actually have the utmost respect for him still – mine was a ringer. I watched with satisfied glee as he turned those smug, self-assured looks into panic and dismay every single time. One such “defense witness” was a 300-pound, tattooed ex-con that went by the nickname “Bear” (oh yeah, they put-on a quality case – lacking only elephants and a ringmaster tightwire act trained monkeys… shit, elephants), who at one point adamantly raised his voice to my attorney, “…and frankly, I RESENT YOU making these ACCUSATIONS about my FRIEND,” as my attorney was questioning him about his knowledge of our perp’s criminal convictions. With remarkable ferocity and matched agility, my parrotthead-attorney-judge lunged halfway across the table at the witness, slamming his fist down to punctuate the statement, “these aren’t accusations, my friend, they are court-determined, LEGAL FACT!!”

I still wish I had had a camera to get that picture… Of a big, dirty, hairy, biker-looking freak with his ill-fitting dress shirt and poorly knotted tie beneath a red fu-manchu moustache, looking quite suddenly like a scared kitten.

Heh.

After the case was decided, my ex-monster-in-law blamed Alabama’s “Good-Ol-Boy Legal System®” for their loss.

Damned right… You won’t like what happens when we go redneck on your ass!

UPDATE:  3/15/07 – 19:55

Though it took me time to notice, I’m honored to have been quoted in a post by the very eloquent Marine wife/tech wench, Cassandra, of Villainous Company.   Her site is worth a read.  go check it out! 

UPDATE: 11:30pm

I’ve contemplated removing this post entirely. Calling out Evil by its name has unsettled me, I guess. For now, I’m putting the whole thing below the fold. Really, I can’t even look at it. Read if you want, but if it touches you the same way it did me – you’ll probably feel like showering afterward.

Maybe it’s just the culmination of all the events I’ve recounted, the bubbling to the surface of all the old emotion, still raw and painful… But what is truly strange is that since I wrote this, there has been a seemingly constant barrage of dark images and events that have assaulted me this evening…

I feel as though I need… Really, you can’t imagine the gravity – you don’t know how unlikely it is for me to say this: I am off to go pray.

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This is yet another reason The growing list of reasons why I hate Utah:

Two sex offenders living side-by-side, just 150 yards from a playground. The endpoint at the edge of the playground is actually a gate where students can pass from the schoolyard into the neighborhood and vice-versa. So far as I am aware, there is currently no law in the state of Utah that prohibits convicted, registered sex offenders from living within a given proximity to a school, church, public park or playground. And there certainly is no law prohibiting the Move-In Victimization of children and families – the State essentially sanctioned it in my case. There are, however, adequate laws in place to protect sex offenders from harassment.

Evidently, the mere act of making someone else aware of a sex offender’s public record status is “publicizing” – and therefore legally considered “harassment” in Utah.

I’d happily link to the offenders’ identifying information, but unless you find it on your own, the Pretty, Great State of Utah™ considers it illegal to use the information they provide to alert your neighbors. As it states on the Official State of Utah Sex Offender Registry website:

Pursuant to Utah Code Ann. Section 77-27-21.5(21)(b) and (c), members of the public are not allowed to publicize the information or use it to harass or threaten sex offenders or members of their families; and harassment, stalking, or threats against sex offenders or their families are prohibited and doing so may violate Utah criminal laws.

It is exactly this State’s attitude of protection and promotion of convicted, incarcerated and released sex offenders that led to the victimization of my children. Mrs. Who at one time had asked one State official if calling or sending mailed notices to the neighbors, notifying them of the personal danger he represents within their neighborhood as based on our experience would be unlawful. We were told quite matter-of-factly that without a doubt such action would violate Utah State Law. WHAT?!! She didn’t believe me – maybe she thought I had misunderstood – so she had to hear it for herself from the horse’s mouth.

My knowledge of these two offenders is based in personal experience, and I have indeed found the same identifying information elsewhere on the web. Nevertheless, I’m reluctant to post names of the scum because of the litigiousness of at least one of the parties involved, and also because of the positioning of the State in defending them. One of the offenders I show here is actually “un-mappable” because either he has provided incorrect information or the State has recorded it errantly. The address listed on the official State website would in reality be halfway up a mountain on the other side of the valley, and neither within the city nor the zip code listed.

I’ll credit Google Earth for providing the detailed aerial, and I encourage people to use it wisely in conjunction with other tools such as Family Watchdog National Sex Offender Registry to inform yourself by identifying dangers to your family. I trust Google will allow this ‘fair use’ of their software and not side with the scum, vermin and sickos and those who enable them to enjoy their freedom and practice their hobbies so freely.

**************** :UPDATE: ****************

I need to clarify perhaps the most important thing relative to my first bullet point on listening to your child. I’ve heard it time and again, but the message rang true in a friend’s own story, and it is perhaps the most important of all:

BELIEVE your child!

I’ll say it again. When your child comes to you with information that you may find uncomfortable, don’t dismiss it because so-and-so’s a good friend and neighbor, or “Uncle Charlie would never do such a thing!” Damn your ‘comfort-zone’ or embarrassment or whatever hangups you have, believe them! True enough, the holidays are going to be a bitch – having put your brother-in-law in prison and all – and yes, it may even mean having to cook your own damn turkey…

But our single most important (and often neglected) trust relationship is the one we have with our children.

Get over your hangups! No matter how uncomfortable the news may be, that relative or good friend or neighbor isn’t worth losing your child’s trust – and maybe even losing your child. Kids often speak in ‘code’ – acting-up or withdrawing – things that you have to be more alert and in-tune to interpret. But sometimes they are, in fact, direct. When they come to you with something unexpected or shockingly unbelievable, listen to them and believe what they say, and at least make an effort to understand what they need help with and follow-through.

And don’t try or believe you have to deal with it alone! There’s plenty of help available out there on how to confront sexual abuse…

********************************************

I realize my last post is some heavy reading, but it’s been a long-time coming. I’ve hinted around at it long enough, and I have to say, it’s good to get it out.

One of the most important things I think I want to convey is listen to your children. The signs are there, but they won’t always say what needs to be said out of fear. My own sons were described as “the most reticent” one counselor had ever seen in over twenty years of work with abuse victims. Years later, I still do not know all or even most of what happened, and perhaps never will.

But the signs were there. There were cries – desperate pleas for help. In their actions. In their behaviors and fears. In their attitudes toward people and situations. In their language and the descriptions of their dreams and (lack of) goals or hopes for the future. In their body language.

Sexual predators are often masterful in their pursuits. They know the minds of their victims, and their own self-preservation is often artfully ensconced in a delicate but vicious weapon of intricately woven lies, guilt, threats and affections.

If there’s one thing you need to know about sexual predators, it’s this: Just like rape, it’s not necessarily about the sex. It’s about power and control of the victim. Our case was a clear example of this. He was “classified” by the sex-offender program as a non-homosexual threat because his previous victims were both female. Yet that’s almost where the similarity between them ended. One was young – in her early to mid teens, healthy and alert. The other was a bedridden woman with a limited capacity for speech or lucid expression – and easily old enough to be his grandmother. She had to be carried to the bathroom and was routinely diapered. Not exactly what one would be consider a very appealing ‘object of desire’ for a healthy, teenage, heterosexual male.

But there was one thing that both shared at the time of their victimization, and that was that he had power over and control of them. It was the same kind of control he enjoyed over my sons – he just modified his ‘technique’ to fit his new circumstances.

Here are a few ‘obvious’ things that I just feel I need to say:

• Parents, know who is around your children, but more important listen to them. Listen not just to their words, but hear their un-voiced messages too. Be especially alert for changes in their regular habits, moods or behaviors.
• Let them know that you are willing to hear them ramble on about whatever fills their little heads, because if you make it obvious you don’t have time for what easily spills off their tongue, you’ll never ever hear from them the secret that threatens to tie it.
• Realize that discussing sex is probably much more embarrassing for you than it is for them – and get over it! If they see that you can’t talk about sex, they’re sure not going to be the ones to bring the subject up when they encounter something sexual in nature or it happens to them!
• Prompt them to ask questions. Don’t just deliver The Talk – Make it a Q&A and be sure you ask questions too. You’d be surprised how much your child thinks she or he knows that is incorrect. More importantly, you’ll learn more about his or her world and the influences you may not otherwise see. Just remember to keep it simple. You don’t need to be the Grand Inquisitioner.
• Be frank, honest and judgemental. Remember that you are your child’s parent – which is a far-higher honor than being your child’s friend. They will have plenty of friends come and go in their lives. The tough lessons have to come from you – and among the most important of these is assisting them to calibrate their moral compass. Helping them to discern what’s right and wrong in a society where they’re bombarded daily with such images as Britney Flashing the Beav’ and millionaire sports heroes brawling in the stands with fans can be more than a little confusing for most of us. Don’t let them mistake your nonchalance or even ignorance of what they see for your ‘rubber-stamp acceptance.’
• Which leads to knowing what they’re seeing, discussing and doing, especially on the Internet. Privacy (in their social lives) is a privilege for your children, but it’s not a right. They might balk and fuss, but it’s a different world than the one we grew up in. Knowing what your child is up to isn’t spying – it’s guidance.

I really don’t consider myself any kind of authority on good parenting, and I don’t know how this list even started churning… Take from it what you will, or take it all with a grain of salt.

If anything, I guess the one thing I’ve learned in these last two posts is that I need to start using the “more” button more frequently along with some stern content warnings to spare y’all the rigors of my weighty reads!

My humblest apologies… (Retracted, per Graumagus. Thanks!)

Oh, I was so not ready to read this over at Grau’s.

He refers to this AP News article about New York’s latest effort to protect its citizenry from the truly sick bastards who commit sex crimes, especially against children, and who are not deemed ‘safe’ for full-release into society. A giant step beyond a mere sex offender registry, New York governor Spitzer is negotiating with legislators how to ‘release’ dangerous offenders into permanent psychiatric care and confinement once their punitive phase is completed.

Graumagus voices a very valid point – our government doesn’t need another slippery slope on which to position the rights of the individual. Any internment that defies the scope of legal sentencing is a dangerous prospect for all citizens – not just the ones who deserve it. And to quote Grau, “any comments about Gitmo will be bitchslapped into oblivion: apples and oranges, folks.”

I won’t quote Grau any further, because I have too much respect, and I’m not attacking his opinion at all. In fact, I wholeheartedly agree with the sentiment (okay just one more quote…):

If you believe (and in this case, I agree completely) that pedophiles who molest children should never be allowed to walk free or, better still, should be terminated with extreme prejudice, then change the goddamn laws so they can be sentenced as such. I wouldn’t have a bit of a problem serving on a jury and voting “yea” to convict some pedophile asshole and send him off to be strapped on a table and have poison purchased with my tax dollars stop his black heart as he pisses and shits himself (a bullet would be cheaper and quicker, but I digress…)

…

Give rapists (of the non-consensual type) and child molesters an automatic one way ticket down death row and you wouldn’t need a fucking registry…

The only problem with that idea is that it will never happen in our society. The cause and the cure don’t lie in our sentencing laws, but somewhere buried deep in the fabric of our society itself. We’re a nation of instant gratification, and of moral relativism: If it feels good, do it – and if you’re not the only one doing it, it must be an accepted practice!

Twenty years ago, homosexuality still possessed a modicum of social stigma, but it was emerging rapidly into the mainstream of our society. I watched with horror as young men – kids, really – anguished with the ‘peer pressure’ to become gay. Now, however, homosexuality is a preferred lifestyle. We have such perverse media bombardment as the likes of the salaciously titled “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” and countless other programs and homosexual character portrayals pumped into our homes daily and so we have become inured. The goal isn’t just acceptance – it’s expansionism. It’s the so-called “liberation” of the homosexual lifestyle. There’s a thrill expressed by “gay” individuals who attempt to ‘turn’ a straight person in their oft-expressed push to ‘discover one’s latent homosexuality‘ – something that according to some gay activists exists in nearly everyone. Wow, now there’s a push to acceptance… Make everyone else realize – or at least believe - that down deep, they’re just like you.

Rest assured, members of groups like NAMBLA (North American Man-Boy Love Association) and those who privately associate with their ideals are waiting in the wings for their day in the sun, too. The problem isn’t going to go away. It’s not going to get better with tougher sentencing. We’re only drawing lines in the shifting sand. I can almost guarantee you that there will be an eventual push for ‘understanding’ these people, and blaming their actions on some societal influence or previously unrecognized genetic causality.

Honestly, I don’t know what the solution may be.

Perhaps mandatory sterilization and deportation to Canada?

JUST KIDDING! They might sneak back across the border…

(I know I have some good Canucks reading – really, I didn’t mean to offend… But shipping them to Antarctica might endanger the penguin populations!)

I’ll agree with Grau that the sex offender registries are getting out of hand too, in the very same way that the label “Nazi” is used so flippantly today that it cheapens the true horror of Hitler’s ambitions, motives and actions, as well as the actions of the people who individually and collectively empowered him and did his bidding.

When a man can be arrested and branded a sex offender for taking a young girl by the wrist to her parents after nearly running her down in the street… For having ‘illegally restrained a minor’ or some such rot, on his way to let her asshat parents know that their unsupervised child darted out in the road and damn near ate a chunk of grille and/or asphalt, but by the grace of God and good brakes he spared her life – THAT is an obscene injustice. He would have been better off killing the child with his vehicle and letting his insurance company settle it by monetary remuneration. Fuck her halfwit parents and the system that convicted him under such bullshit ‘stricter laws and sentencing.’

But for the truly sick and twisted, there is no reform, no recompense, and no having “paid a debt to society.” In my opinion, the Gitmo case is not apples and oranges where sex offenders are concerned. There has to be a way to remove them from society if they continue to be a danger. I would no sooner let a ‘reformed’ sex offender move into a house just 60 yards from a schoolyard than I would let an ‘enemy combatant’ free to walk the streets of Miami or Los Angeles or Detroit with the same seething hatred and religious beliefs buried in his psyche as when he was ushered through the gates.

In the Pretty, Great State of Utah™, for instance, a twice-convicted sex offender, having ‘served his time’ and ‘fulfilled his debt to society’ is deemed “safe” for release if he can pass a penile plethysmograph (PPG) test (or as the Utah Department of Corrections officials endearingly refer to it, a “peter-meter”) while listening to audio descriptions of various sexual acts and suggestive scenarios. NO VISUAL STIMULATION is allowed in these tests, which might cause an ‘inappropriate response’ and thereby ‘invalidate the results.’ (!!)

In such a case as I have personal witness, the sex offender in question was only a teenager at the time of his ‘original misdeeds’ – at least the ones he for which he was caught, charged and convicted. He had entered a plea agreement to a charge of ‘Attempted Forcible Sex Abuse’ for having continually molested his younger sister over the course of “at least eighteen months, but perhaps longer, I don’t recall.” He received probation. While serving that probation, and in the service of the UDOC Sex Offender Program – which has a mission statement (no shit – it’s on their website) “Help Offenders Succeed” – he was witnessed to have inserted his fingers into the vagina of a bedridden woman in her 70′s, who suffered from “senile dementia and chronic urinary tract infections” after she was left in his immediate care in the nursing home where he was working.

He was sentenced to prison. He served his time – more than five years – part of which was spent sharing stories swapping fantasy material with his cellmate, convicted of raping his own 12-year old daughter.

He had “paid his debt to society” and was now free. Free to ‘re-integrate’ into society and establish new relationships.

Seven years.

That’s how long it had been since he had last committed been convicted of a crime before he met a divorced, single mother.

“Once or twice.”

That’s how many times the social worker who was handling his ‘reintegration’ saw her children – three boys – as they were living together and making plans to marry.

Nine months.

That’s how long it took for the oldest boy, then nine years old, to begin exhibiting alarming behavior – threatening suicide, self-mutilating, spewing vile obscenities and sexual references, and threatening to kill others, including his teacher and principal.

Two counselors…

Who agreed there is something terribly wrong, but wouldn’t make the link to sexual abuse because the offender’s status was protected by those who had felt he’d just had a ‘bad rap.’

Three schools.

The children were moved from school to school to school as their problems intensified. The younger (middle) boy had suffered a developmental regression and his speech and was barely intelligible. His older brother was his interpreter. When he drew a picture with brightly colored stripes of yellow and red crayon, he described the picture, “yellow, blood, yellow, blood…” He routinely fantasized aloud of blood and brains on the pavement in grave injuries suffered by himself and those around him, of people falling off rooftops and being run-down by busses and trucks, stabbed with knives, etc. He was but four years old.

One phrase uttered…

That caused me to look for the reason my ex-wife was to appear in court. Turns out she was just a witness to a robbery in a convenience store where she worked, but it’s what led me to something much darker.

Ten years…

Was the age of the court document that the court clerk mistakenly read aloud, with my ex’s new husband’s name – the record of his original court docket was still in the court clerk’s online records system. It was the moment of revelation – the epiphany that perfectly explained what was happening to my sons. It was why my ex and her family were all so secretive, evasive, and misleading.

Sixty thousand dollars.

That’s what it cost to fight an interstate custody battle that spanned 2000 miles and two state jurisdictions to get my sons away from a convicted, ex-con sex offender, based on that sole fact alone, without anything concrete that was ‘admissible in court’ as evidence that my sons were in danger of being and indeed had been molested. It is the relatively insignificant price tag on an ordeal that has bankrupted me not only financially, but emotionally as well.

One meddling Ex-Husband-In-Law and his equally disturbed wife.

Fishhook and Leatherface decided to insinuate themselves into my custody proceedings, despite my warning not to interfere (“It’s a FREE country – I can talk to anyone I want!”) for no other reason than to exact revenge on Mrs. Who for his own perceived misgivings. They contacted and passed information to my ex and her counsel. Mrs. Who was subpoenaed, deposed, and the contrived heresay information was summarily thrown-out in court. Their actions were purely malicious and threatened the welfare of my children. I. Have NOT. Forgotten.

One wig, a bustier, mini-skirt, fishnet stockings and facial make-up…

The ‘Ho costume’ as my eldest described it to the judge in chambers that his mother had dressed him in the previous Halloween. My son conveyed that he understood that a “ho” was someone who either ‘had sex for money’ or ‘gave it away for free.’ If not for that one bit of testimony, my whole case against a twice-convicted felony sex-offender was described as “tenuous” and “regrettably, nowhere near a slam-dunk.”

Two years.

The length of time it took the fucking ‘justice’ system to finally award me sole custody of my children.

Three years.

The length of time, after my children were with me that my oldest son first admitted any explicit details of his sexual abuse. Of the sharing of pornography – printed, video and from the Internet. Of the alcohol – drinking until inebriated and “not knowing or remembering what happened after that.” Of the shared – even group showers and baths with their stepfather. Of the clear shower curtain hung so his stepfather could watch. This, combined with their mother’s refusal to show-up in court was the pivotal information that allowed a judge to additionally terminate all visitation after learning that the abuse was continuing during visits subsequent to the first ruling which awarded me custody, but allowed her standard visitation, including up to six weeks in the summer!

Two years.

Both the time since we filed criminal charges, and the time remaining to convict him under the four-year statute of limitations.

Two detectives, one social worker, and one Assistant District Attorney.

Can’t prove or won’t prosecute a case based on the ‘heresay’ of my son’s testimony. (WTF??!)

One Evil Grandmother™ = Three attorneys.

The principal investigator reported that on attempting to question the scum, he had a ‘legal team’ of three attorneys, provided by – as the detective understood, his mother-in-law. The children’s own grandmother. One of the attorneys was the same who was involved in defending a recent high-profile murder case where the victim was dumped in the county landfill. (Note that for shooting his wife in the head and disposing of her body like a used condom in a garbage-dump and then lying to police and search teams, Mark Hacking got only six years to life!) The detective admitted regretfully that with his legal team guarding him during questioning, they were unable to pin him down on the facts, and with no remaining physical evidence… Our case is stalled.

Five years…

…since my sons have been removed safely away from the clutches of a sex offender. And suddenly, along comes more cutting, suicidal thoughts and expressions and grief…

Just two weeks ago, my eldest was referred to inpatient mental health directly from school – it was a one-way ticket. If I didn’t take him there, he was expelled on the spot for the sake of the school’s liability, and no doubt I would have been reported to child welfare and lost him again – this time to foster care. It seems he’s been agonizing over something else – some deeper, darker secret that he’s been afraid to tell anyone, even me, for the irrational fear that he would be rejected, despised, even loathed. But it was bound to come-out sooner or later. He has repeatedly rebuffed the attention of girls. He’s a handsome kid, and to be honest, I worried that his experience had left him consumed with doubts about ‘gay tendencies’ or the stigma of homosexuality for having ‘participated’ in the acts that were forced upon him.

Of course I was wrong, at least in one sense. He likes girls. A lot. But he has been living with the agonizing fear and self-hatred for FIVE LONG YEARS that he was carrying a sexually transmitted disease – the result of his molestation. We were fortunate. His diagnosis was negative. But today’s relief doesn’t take away the pain of those long years of terrible, all-consuming fear. As he gets older, this inner turmoil has been brewing and fermenting as his own hormones and social urges become stronger. Wanting a relationship and at the same time fearing it so – I can’t even begin to imagine that psychological pain… In the irrational mind of a child – somehow a part of him “locked” at the age where his molestation began – he feared he was ‘damaged goods’ that would be rejected for the ‘stain’ that was upon him.

A ‘stain’ on his soul, left by a man that had “Paid His Debt to Society.”

One Child. No witnesses.

He is my sons’ half brother, the son of another man whom I’ve never met and don’t know how to find, and the child is still in the clutches of a sex offender.

The youngest of three brothers – he was the product of an affair with (as I understand) a married man who was quickly spirited out of his own son’s life. That child has my last name on his birth certificate, but does not share my ethnicity and so looks nothing like me or his brothers. He’s been calling a sex offender “Daddy” for his whole speaking life, and has been under the impression that I’m just some evil sonofabitch who took away his brothers – whom he also believed to belong to “Daddy.” In fact, they were all using the perp’s last name as their own as he bound them to himself with lies and promises and threats. (“yellow, blood, yellow, blood…”) My sons had been made to believe that I had abandoned them, that I had “my own life that didn’t include them,” and that I had “let them” take that evil prick’s name… Meanwhile, they often were unavailable whenever I called or wanted to visit – always off camping or hunting, or having fun with their stepfather.

Despite their powerlessness, my sons feel responsible for their little brother’s safety. They want desperately to save him, but reluctantly realize that at least for now, he’s well beyond their reach. In the irrational mind of an eleven year old, if Mommy would just divorce the bad guy, everything would be okay again. He doesn’t understand… He can’t understand why there are people who protect the perp – who believe that he has been wrongly accused, or that he just has a problem that they can treat or cure. Hell, I’m 41 and I don’t understand why anybody would stand behind such a monster. But those people do exist – most of them probably vote Democrat – and perhaps somehow they believe their intentions are good.

Grandpa testified in open court that he was initially shocked that his daughter was dating a sex offender, but that he had him followed, and investigated. He said he was relieved to find nothing out of the ordinary, and when he saw “how well he interacted with the kids,” he was sold on his so-called genuine intentions. “He’s a swell guy,” and “really good with the kids – he gets down on their level and really listens to them. He’s more than a father (!!) to them, he’s like their best friend.”

Really – how stunning that a child molester can empathize with and manipulate the affections of children.

Evil Grandma, went even farther in his defense, claiming that his in his original case, his sister “wanted it. She instigated most of what happened… It was consensual sex“ and “the whole family was doing it” even “there’s nothing wrong with the human body and exploring – maybe they were just curious.” (So was she saying it was my sons’ fault?!!)

Curiously, she moved her very own sex offender into the ‘basement-apartment’ of her single-family residence. Apparently seeing her daughter living with one must have looked appealing.

So to sum up, I just don’t believe most sex offenders (TRUE offenders, not drunken idiots or products of unfortunate circumstances which don’t warrant true sex-offense charges) can be trusted or allowed to re-enter society, and I don’t believe that sentencing will get any tougher without risking other, equally dangerous abuses of the law. Recidivism rates for genuine sex offenders are through the roof, and temptations – the fuel to feed their twisted desires – are everywhere in our society, especially in our media and on the Internet. Our society has become steeped in objectified, ‘casual’ sex. Morality, especially of the religious variety is passe. Unless we can cure the societal ills that are creating Internet predators and teachers who choose to have sex with their middle school students, I say we need a Sexual-Predator Club Gitmo™.

That, or a Real Justice for Victims™ law that exacts “severe penalties” for victims’ “vengeful acts of termination with extreme prejudice” – like perhaps maximum sentencing of up to a week’s house arrest with the Fox News Channel and conservative talk-radio, and fines to offset the cost of the amount of marine diesel used to chum the waters with the perp’s fetid remains. (Shit, that might get PETA involved… scratch that last part.) Further, I would propose the institution of a VVR – Vengeful Victim Registry™ that tallies the body count and mandates ‘public notification’ – insuring that their residence and/or car must carry some sort of signage that says something to the effect of “I’ve Executed n Perverts. Are You Next?”

I fear that some of you reading this might suddenly be gaping in horror, but it’s my own twisted humor, folks… Tongue-in-cheek. Really.

I do try to laugh when I can. If it weren’t for humor and a whole lot of miles – and most importantly, the love and support of my sons and my family – I’d probably be sitting in prison…

**** UPDATE ****

If you were directed here by Blog Carnival or another link, please also see my next post for some positive suggestions. Thanks for stopping by, and do please feel free to add your voice to the comments!

(Thanks for the advice, Harvey! Really, what’s a blogpappy for?)